Blog Home

"Essentials of California Family Law" Third Edition now available!
Posted by: Mary Ellen Waller
September 05, 2011
Topic: Divorce

The updated 2011 Third Edition of The Essentials of California Family Law by Marshall W. Waller, CFLS, is available for purchase just in time for the upcoming October 2011 California Certified Family Law Specialist Exam.

Marshall Waller originally compiled the text while studying for certification as a California Family Law Specialist. The book has been updated to serve as a useful study guide for attorney's taking the 2011 California Certified Family Law Specialist examination. In other words, it is written for the education of family lawyers. It is a valuable resource that can also be used not only by attorneys preparing for the family law specialist exam but also as an every day practice guide for family law attorneys. Now for the first time, you can purchase this exclusive lawyer-to-lawyer book and gain a privileged view of California family law.

Marshall W. Waller is a Certified Family Law Specialist, so certified through the Board of Legal Specialization of the State Bar of California; he has been in the active practice of law for more than twenty-nine years. He has taught family law and has also written an additional text published by Aspen publishing entitled California Family law for Paralegals, presently in its 5th edition. His commentaries as an authority in family law have been published by local, national and international news media. Marshall Waller carries the highest rating available from the premier attorney-rating system in the nation, Martindale Hubble: AV. He is a shareholder and partner at Feinberg & Waller, APC. The firm's website can be found at the firm website: feinbergwaller.com.

To purchase a copy of the updated 2011 PDF e-book The Essentials of California Family Law by Marshall W. Waller, call 1-800-655-4766 between the hours of 9 a.m. and 5 p.m., Pacific Time. The cost of the book is $150.00, credit cards only. The updated 2011 version may only be purchased by phone and is not available via the Internet. We invite you to circulate this e-mail to others who may be interested in purchasing this essential guidebook.

Permalink

What Cost Infidelity? Observations From A California Certified Family Law Specialist On the Schwarzenegger/Shriver Drama
Posted by: Marshall Waller
May 20, 2011
Topic: Celebrity Divorce

The headlines around the world this week are sharing details of the secret child born to Arnold Schwarzenegger. The media coverage is relentless. This media pursuit is far from unique to Arnold Schwarzenegger and his wife Maria Shriver. It is also regularly seen with other high-profile celebrity couples. It is easy to recall the international media circus surrounding the Tiger Woods / Elin Nordegren and Jesse James / Sandra Bullock divorces. These voyeuristic forays capitalize on our common human interest in the sordid. This almost desperate need of our society to want to learn details of the private lives of the celebrity has certainly reached a frenzied pitch. The news of the "event," the word Schwarzenegger used to describe his actions leading to his 14 year-old-child born out of wedlock to the family's former housekeeper, herself married at the time she became pregnant, has the media clamoring. Schwarzenegger's scandal has reached a new zenith in public media scolding, most likely due to the particulars of his situation: his role as entertainment superstar, his role as former Governor of the State of California, and his marriage into the Kennedy family.

We know now of the affairs of John F. Kennedy, Maria Shriver's, uncle, but back then indiscretions were well kept and respected "secrets," with an understanding between the media and the family that it would remain out of the public's view. Those days of media respect for a celebrity's privacy are long gone. The immediacy and worldwide reach of the Internet is upon us. Add to that the news media's need to sensationalize most everything so as to attract viewers and that has lead to an unprecedented dissemination of gossip and celebrity "news." Never before has the news of an out-of-wedlock child circulated around the globe like this, in a massive communications blast of public shaming. The public shaming will certainly continue for quite some time (at least until the next source of gossip stumbles into this net) and the ramifications of public investigations into a deceitful move will reverberate for many years.

This public outcry and interest is also the result of Schwarzenegger's own personal decision to seek a spotlight on the public stage. However, the impact this spotlight puts on the family can be devastating, a lesson so often learned through the crucible of a public scandal. As for the actors themselves in this drama, the "grownups" if you will, we can simply offer our personal thoughts and sometimes judgment and move on; they knew what they were getting into and are presumed to have the qualities necessary to ride out their personal storms. But what of the children of these fallen heroes? A heartbreaking posting this week on Twitter by Schwarzenegger's seventeen-year-old son demonstrates the conflict and anguish of this situation.

As reported by ABC's Good Morning America, Schwarzenegger's 17-year-old son Patrick changed the name on his Twitter account from "Patrick Schwarzenegger" to "Patrick Shriver." This is a sad act by this child who clearly is upset over the situation with his father. And here we are, watching it all play out in the stark light of day, to the genuine detriment of these two families and these several children.

The harsh glare of the spotlight will be difficult for all the Schwarzenegger children: his children with Maria Shriver have just learned they have a half brother, and his son with his former housekeeper has just learned he has new brothers and sisters. Put bluntly, these kids are all likely to need plenty of therapy to help them get through what may one of the most traumatic situations in their respective young lives. It is fortunate that the family can financially afford that kind of professional help because traumatic events can lead to years and years of problems for these kids and the sooner the intervention of mental health professionals is made available the sooner these children can learn to cope with the fallout of this bad behavior.

It would behoove these parents for the sake of their children to avoid airing their dirty laundry in public (and they do indeed seem to be attempting just that so far), though this may be difficult if investigations require the testimony of witnesses in court or some other public forum. A divorce could get dicey. There is no such thing as a "good divorce," especially when children areinvolved. Some of this will depend on whether or not there is a pre-marital agreement (which there most likely is), though if it was drawn up twenty-five years ago it may not have contemplated some issues that may have since arisen or the pre-marital agreement may have been very general. This could lead to negotiations or litigation over assets, something that a pre-marital agreement is intended to prevent and which would have the effect of taking the focus of these parents away from their children

Of course the division of assets is just the tip of the iceberg in a case like this where there are children involved. And that is exactly where the epicenter of this issue can be found: the impact of this drama on the children and the effect it will have on both of these families.

This is of course not a new or even unusual situation. As a divorce and custody specialist I have seen instances of infidelity, betrayal, deceit and manipulation on a daily basis for nearly thirty years; even out of wedlock children. Marriage, it seems, is sometimes a nasty business. It is nonetheless an interesting and raw glimpse into the human condition, a condition readily exploited when it involves a celebrity, one of society's "heroes."

An interesting and unsettling dynamic is seen in this "Hero worship" that has become endemic in our society: we raise our heroes up and invest in them our adulation and seemingly never-ending praise and worship. This understandably contributes to the feelings and delusions of grandeur that sometimes take control over people's judgment, reason, empathy and actions. When that happens, of course, society stands poised at the ready to seize upon their lapses and then pillory them in the public eye. Sadly, this tsunami of attention is not satisfied with the fallen heroes; there is all too often "collateral damage:" the wives, the parents, the friends, the co-workers, and most importantly the children.

Throughout our shared human history we have seen these stories of the feats of the Gods and monsters throughout Greek, Roman, Norse, Indian and other mythology. Mankind feeds on these stories, so we really shouldn't be all that shell-shocked when they sometimes play out in reality. Ours is a history and culture born of achievement, overcoming adversity, rise to power, abuse of the privileges granted by the masses, fall from grace and then, very often, redemption. Along the way is left a trail of disappointment, suffering and heartache. And we watch. Indeed, as I sit here in Starbucks tapping this article out on my laptop I am privy to three separate conversations about this drama, and to hear them is a fascinating reflection on our society and our interesting (and sometimes odd) interests in the lives of these other people.

When will we realize that we as humans in general, and members of any given society or culture in particular, are all in this together?

I am deeply concerned for the future of all these children involved in this Schwarzenegger drama; here the betrayal runs the deepest and will no doubt carry these children headlong into a future forever filled with passing observation, voracious scrutiny, possible ridicule, embarrassment, shame, humiliation, pity, and the list goes on. These are the true victims of this tragedy and these are the victims that so often have no voice. How can we, the public, help them? Sadly I don't have that answer, but I can tell you a good place to start: We can give them comfort and support. We can accept them without judgment or even commentary on the sins of their parents. We can allow them to flourish and become the individuals they were intended to be, without the need to carry this albatross that society tries to drape around their necks. We can let them live their lives fully, without worrying about us. We can leave them alone.

Permalink

Musings on the Goings On at the Royal Mews and Buckingham Palace
Posted by: Mary Ellen and Marshall Waller
April 28, 2011
Topic: Relationships

Royal Wedding excitement abounds this week in London. The numbers attending the changing of the guards at Buckingham Palace has more then tripled in the days leading up to the wedding. Streets are decorated with flags of the British Crown. The carriages, cars and horses to be used for the wedding are readied at the Royal Mews, the Royal transport facility. Pubs and restaurants are all preparing celebratory parties for the big event. Camera-toting news teams cruise the wedding parade route.

There are grumbling complaints from some that we are being inundated with news coverage of the Royal Wedding. Suffice it to say this dynamic is likely more than simply an insatiable appetite to live a little vicariously.  News team “road trip” mentality is likely a driving force behind some of the coverage spectacle. This beautiful spring week is certainly a boondoggle perk for a number of reporters.

 Genuine interest in the Wedding, both here and abroad, does indeed appear to be high. However, the international concentration goes beyond mere curiosity. Many will distinctly recall the tragic and untimely death of William’s mother Princess Diana. We watched him suffer as he walked stoically behind his mother’s casket. Many feared him to be the product of a dysfunctional union and all are aware of the pain he has endured, and at such a young age. William has been an innocent player in this soap opera that is royalty, one who has felt the consequences of the decisions made by his parents. That this so public an individual now finds love and happiness with a beautiful wife who understands him is the ultimate fairytale ending. The public is ready to rejoice and celebrate this union as William and Kate demonstrate hope for the future.

The fact that this “modern couple,” (the term often used to describe William and Kate, and that appears to be a euphemism for openly living together as a couple), are from different social classes makes this romance even all the more intriguing as they break with social class distinction and tradition. A monarchy existing within a democracy is a bit incongruous. There have however been English Kings and Queens for more than a thousand years, royalty who have gained their position primarily by accident of birth, Prince William being but one of the most recent examples. Historically inter-nobility marriage was used as a method of forming alliances among elite powers. These marriages were used to protect property and wealth. To suppose however, that love would remain confined to a small set of royal-blooded titled people has always been somewhat naïve.

There is of course no accounting for love or fate. Arranged marriages are of a bygone era. A prince marrying a commoner has never before happened in England, and the significance of this event, some would say, is a triumph of love. We are, after all, just people when it comes right down to it. These barriers of protocol have now toppled and that is likely a plus for the royal gene pool.

Fate, love and sheer luck of birth have come together giving rise to class and privilege for William and Kate. It will afford them the opportunity to have political as well as social influence. Prince William and his wife will be symbols of national unity. This role is a tremendous and daunting responsibility for the young couple. Let us not forget that the promotion of British culture and heritage is big business for that country’s tourism industry. For all intents and purposes this couple’s “official” role encompasses being spokes models for the British Nation and its people as well as the monarchy.

It is hard to disagree with the notion that if one desires to promote a county one would be hard pressed to find a more elegant and gracious couple with squeaky-clean backgrounds who are already both out there in the world striving to achieve philanthropic and humanitarian goals. Despite all the tragedy and dysfunction, William is far from the so-called prodigal son. He did not ask for this position; he could have turned his back on that responsibility but he has not. It must be a blessing for William’s grandmother to know that her grandson understands the weighty role before him and that he appreciates the country’s rich traditions. The public has heard only complimentary things about both these individuals. William and Kate’s ability to carry on with dignity and respect is a tribute to their parents and their families.     

The apparent mutual ability of this couple to “take one for the team” so to speak and step up to their royal duties speaks volumes about their commitment and their character.  As a married couple they may just make it and avoid the pitfalls of divorce. It is the inability to compromise that contributes to divorce. These two people have already demonstrated that they are ready and have the ability to compromise their lives to some degree. They will certainly relinquish a tremendous amount of privacy. They have already withstood a number of trials and tribulations together. Hope springs eternal that the respect and dignity they demonstrate for their cultural heritages is also always reflected in respect and dignity they hold towards one another.

Marriage can be quite difficult. It’s not all storybook, especially living with the fish bowl pressures of such a public life. The couple, like all married couples, will face numerous pressures, and childbirth will bring its challenges as well. Marriage is fluid and it will change over the years. They, like most married couples, will have to learn to tough it out and get past the unhappy times in order to continue with the marriage intact. They will need to work through the problems in their marriage towards a resolution. This couple like all other couples will need to devote time to their own relationship. They will need to spend quality time together and remain unafraid to work on their marriage. They must be willing to remain committed to the marriage even in tough times. So far, they have demonstrated that they have a very high level of commitment to one another and their county. Let the festivities and joyous occasion begin with all the pomp and circumstance befitting a modern royal couple.

Mary Ellen and Marshall Waller are husband and wife divorce attorneys from the United States. They share their perspectives and observations on the Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton upon visiting Westminster Abby, Buckingham Palace and the Royal Mews in the days prior to the Royal Wedding.

Permalink

"Essentials of California Family Law" now available!
Posted by: Mary Ellen Waller
July 16, 2009
Topic: Divorce

The updated 2009 edition of Essentials of California Family Law by Marshall W. Waller is available for purchase just in time for the upcoming August 2009 California Certified Family Law Specialist Exam.

Marshall Waller originally compiled the text while studying for certification as a California Family Law Specialist. The book has been updated to serve as a useful study guide for attorneys taking the 2009 California Certified Family Law Specialist examination. It is written for the education of family lawyers. It is a valuable resource that can be used by attorneys preparing for the family law specialist exam and also as an every day practice guide and desk reference for family law attorneys. Now for the first time you can purchase this exclusive lawyer-to-lawyer book and gain a privileged view of California family law. This is a 329 page extensive resource covering the essentials that every family law attorney should know.

Marshall W. Waller is a Certified Family Law Specialist, so certified by the Board of Legal Specialization of the State Bar of California; he has been in the active practice of law for more than twenty-seven years. He has taught family law and has also written an additional textbook published by Aspen Publishing entitled California Family Law for Paralegals, now in it's 5th edition. His commentaries as an authority in family law have been published by local, national and international news media. Marshall Waller carries the highest rating available from the premier attorney-rating system in the nation, Martindale Hubbell: AV. He is a shareholder and partner at Feinberg & Waller, APC; the firm's website can be viewed at Feinberg & Waller, APC.

To purchase a copy of the updated 2009 PDF e-book Essentials of California Family Law by Marshall W. Waller; call 1-800-655-4766 between the hours of 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. PST. The cost of the book is $150.00, credit cards only. At this time the updated 2009 version may only be purchased by phone.

Permalink

Video Commentary on Michael Jackson Custody Situation
Posted by: Mary Ellen Waller
July 06, 2009
Topic: Custody

The custody issues surrounding the children of deceased pop star Michael Jackson were prominent topics this past week in Los Angeles as national and international news media sought family law analysis and commentary on the Michael Jackson custody situation. The family law offices of Feinberg & Waller, APC, fielded numerous queries from the media with regard to the complex custody issues that could potentially arise for Jackson’s three children, Prince Michael, Paris-Michael and Prince Michael II. The media sought Marshall Waller’s observations on family law matters, as he is a family law textbook author and a certified Family Law Specialist through the Board of Legal Specialization of the State Bar of California with more than 27 years of legal experience. He does not represent any of the parties in this custody situation.

A video interview of California Certified Family Law Specialist Marshall Waller focuses on potential legal questions surrounding custody of the Jackson children. The topical video addresses some interesting custody issues that pertain to the general public as well as the Jackson family. The Jackson situation gives rise to issues that can face every-day families coping with the death of a parent. Video topics include the following: Is it possible that Debra Rowe will be given custody of the children? How difficult is reunification with their mother if she has been out of the children’s lives? And, What happens if Katherine Jackson becomes incapacitated or passes away? The video can be found on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8Q92c-TQSY.

Permalink